Wednesday, 3 March 2010

Bittersweet

I have not been writing as much as I used to be..perhaps this is the real me..just a plain quiet type of person…I have been having this thought of applying for another job after over 4 years with the current company…I always tell people that I could only be thinking of migrating to another company when there’s neither new adventure nor skills to learn…yes that is true and I would not dare to say it isn’t good to others who keeps on thinking of applying job interview though…it’s up to them but when it comes to me at certain time for a wrong reason i.e. management isn’t good...colleagues not co-operating or not getting enough support from your superiors..that sounds like an excuse for not being able to cope with life and challenges…nevertheless, the person who talks about this sort of attempt is not less than a person who doesn’t quite understand about having basic survival skills of taking better care of her/himself and surrounding…too much of dream and ambition but nothing for self-enhancement?

Honestly, I’ve had this thought since last couple of months ago and some of friends have heard about it yet I have not made any attempts of doing so..I have no specific reasons for not making the first move though as I believe it was just a temporary thought and I was partially correct on this…I’d love to learn few more new skills if I may in near time though..maybe the time hasn’t come just yet….These couple of days in 2010 had been quite a mess for me…things happened unconditionally…I could only look for resolution to stay afloat to go through the journey…hell to love! It’s not about love/relationship at all…some people have been advising me of staying single for too long isn’t good for me...they may be correct and I couldn’t deny what was advised but I do have my own reasons for not being into relationship anymore…it’s just not fun anymore although it could bring joyful life once you’ve found the one…haha…in fact, I've never thought of myself a lonely person as I have number of really good friends (I could share good and bad with them) we could find love in many different ways though...spending time watching korean drama series the whole day and night with housemates (plus a crate of beer)...hanging out with friends (although me and Jew have started to realized that there are only both us left enjoying drinking beer at every possibilities in Penang compared to previous years) and my utmost passion of having lots of DVDs to watch..haha…having said that, I’ve spread some of my love towards other living thing surrounding me...we’ve been complaining on the hot weathers since the beginning of 2010 and it was a pity to see a tree without enough leaves to be called a tree….every night after returning home from work, I gave it its need to stay alive during the hot weather…although I knew it is not belong to me to pour water or to take care of it but I couldn’t stop thinking either it will survive the weather or will not…every single day at night and sometimes during day…I poured about 2-3 liters of water at its foundation, after days of doing that I could see new tiny leaves started to grow from its dried branches…I was relieved and happy I could at least do this small part of humanitarian to my surrounding…today, after a heavy rain in more than a month, I could see more green leaves as a new beginning…

A friend has moved to KL last 2 weeks ago due to a new career path….about 9 of us had a decent dinner then continued with couple bottles of beer at the usual place (kedai kopi dusun) although the farewell wasn’t grand and happening but it was great to catch up with others…all the best to him in KL…I’ve known him since 1999 when we were in matriculation…we’ve had great times together ever since…in near time soon, perhaps another friend will be moving down to KL? If you ask me, I have no intention of moving anywhere else at the moment as I love Penang as much as I love Sabah (too bad telampau banyak pilak di Sabah makes it less attractive) It’s been over 10 years o….haha...

I’m having my day off today and I don’t really have anything in mind what to do…most likely I will be spending my time doing DVD (old) Marathon….I’m not addicted to DVD but it is a fun way to spend time, relaxing by watching many types of movies…by now I could roughly estimate 1000 DVDs in my possession (not less but it could be more as I have stopped doing the list since middle last year) sometimes watching movie trailers on Astro led me to re-watch my DVDs…this mostly due to inability to remember the exact story line….having a hobby like me, one will not need to waste time wandering in nearby shopping mall the whole day, window shopping (or shopping) then regret the day after (Sakit kaki, salah beli atau kehabisan duit..haha)

16 comments:

JerryInc said...

well...if you think your time is up, then just move on and try out new experiences somewhere else. we are evolving people and we need new challenges to keep us going :).

yeah, i'm not lonely. i maybe alone but i'm definitely not lonely, with the things i can do and friends to be with..i myself am far from lonely. maybe we're too independent to be relying on other people for personal emotional support hahaahahahaha.

wuiii...klu ko balik kk, bawa semua DVD ko..sa mau pinjam!! muahahahahaha

cLaiRe Bennet said...

Taik ko la Jerry dia mo kasi pinjam. wakakaka nda boleh keluar dr bilik dia tu kenen. cam taik ja. hahahaha

Wel, patut la kau semangat suru saya p jaga bunga kan..ehehe sama sja ba kita ni kaki movie jg..cuma saya karit mo beli semuanya download sja. :D

Wel^Beiolman said...

Jerry...yeah...I was thinking of cruise ship la jerry...it could be interesting moving from place to place and stay afloat on the sea...hehe...might consider that when the time comes...agreed, new adventure new challenges...

Hell to lonely...this is true! we're too independent and I love it cause it will not burden others...why need others to comfort or make us more happier..hehe..

Belum sempat naik kapal suda kana tahan kali sini penang..haha..sorry inda buli keluar ruma durang tu..pantang! I lost some of my fav DVDs (collectors version Mafia 1-3) due to kena pinjam then inda kana kasi balik...huhu..

Claire...haha..awal pg betaie taie suda ko o kan..haha..tp mimang ko pun tau jg o kan..inda la ba inda buli keluar dari bilik..inda buli keluar dari ruma la ba..haha...

semangat..pecinta alam ba sia ni...tp diam2 sja..haha..kalu ada kesempatan satu masa bila ada RM50 juta suda sia sponsor sabah mau tanam pokok tuk replanting sja..haha...punya inda menilai seni btl ko p download..haha...cuba kalo ko bayangkan ada 10 ko download tiap minggu..after a year maybe ko ada lebih 500 movies suda..kalu dvd punya best masi buli tinguk lg selagi dvd masi ok..huhu..download kalu ada buli la kalu teda tepaksa download balik..haha

Vera said...

wel, honestly, things has not been looking up to me as well.. semuanya kelam kabut..

So Wel, i have checked and found out that we, born in the year of Monkey, are going to have a tough year in 2010. things will be bad, worse and worst.. it will be bad frm March-October 2010.. eespecially at work. I for one is no not suprised, why you lack the will to work there anymore.. i can feel it here in KL too..

take it easy this year, don't do anything drastic and don't be stress.. things will not be looking up to you but you are a strong-willed person so u can make it through this year k..

so take care of yourself and also your health.. be kind to yourself and dont be too hard..do the little things that is making you happy.

quit? i have been thinking for 6 months now..but i think i will quit at the end of this year..jomla sama2 quit k! hahaha..

Wel^Beiolman said...

Vera....hi there..haven't heard from you for a while huh...good to hear from you again...

well, I could understand that 2010 may not be so great for some and it may be for others...I guess I'm at the edge of both...it looks good and promising but at the same time I have this feeling of I've been with the company for a while and I think I've managed to get to a level where I needed new adventures...in fact, it's quite interesting of being into IT industry when it's actually revolve with no due or time string attached to it..so there's always new stuff to learn to understand...4 years is quite long and I've had ups and downs along the way...great! work is fine at the moment...I'm not quitting just yet (dreaming of winning jackpot then i wouldn't wait to tender resignation letter...hehe)

Last couple of years ago..I've never thought of stuffs/works becoming routine to me but that's one of the fact I'm realizing happening to me..what would a manager do in a single day? nothing new I reckon...(bagus kalau saya manager - metaphor la ba kenen)

Hey..thanks for the health part...yeah, I've always be nice to my self with beers and DVDs..I could sense health wouldn't be so nice to me this year (got sick twice already)...perhaps because we're into the 3's..haha..you take good care of yourself as well...hope to hear news from the little-black-book soon...cheers and thanks

JerryInc said...

wel: luki...hahahaha
vera: 2010 isn't that bad for us monkeys. it's only bad cos that's what we believe :)

Wel^Beiolman said...

Jerry...haha...peduli la..haha..kalu mau p bili sendiri..haha...

ya betul tu jerry..mcm we believe the year yg kasi tentu nasib kita pula kan not kita...we own our fate not fate owns us..haha..mcm tu ka tu..haha

Frankie said...

Nampaknya dlm dilema ko ni wel...sy pun since these last few months nda berapa menentu ooo...berserabut. byk benda mo dipikir...mo blogging pun teda idea...kerja pun moral down sikit...mungkin pasal ni keadaan cuaca kali. jgn bimbang wel, nnt sy join kamu moginum...tp alcohol consumption sy 50% less la k...xbulih fight kamu yg selalu training wakakak

sweetie~ said...

sia masih sinta teramat kja sia skarang ni so no intention to quit.....thnk God for giving me such a wonderful and enjoyable job...Amen...hehe

Wel^Beiolman said...

Frankie..haha..bukan dalam dilema ba ni...tu pikiran sja ba tu...mcm ko pula dalam dilema ni tau..haha..kalu join ko bawa la 1 crate k..haha..si jew sja yg tiap minggu training...haha..bukan ko ka jg tu dulu rajin membawa p kelab dusun..sejak ada kelab baru ko terus ko pandang hina suda kelab dusun kan..haha..

Sweetie...hehe..syukur ada keja mcm tu kan..belum mau berenti ba...tp tu perasaan mau mencari new adventures mcm siok...mungkin ko telampau manja suda sama keja ko sekarang ni tau sweetie..hehe..

sweetie~ said...

yg penting happy ba wel dan duit ada baguih....hehe. Org blang don't expect for a challenging job...but it is you who can make the job more challenging....hehe

Wel^Beiolman said...

Sweetie...hehe..ya la...not new challenge ba am looking for...haha..looking for new adventures...hehe.mau jg kasi wide ni knowledge and skill dalam bidang lain not only IT..haha....betul tu sweetie..mcm mana ko kasi challenge keja ko..haha..ko sengaja tension supaya nampak mcm challenging butul ni keja kenen ka..haha...tp yg penting mesti enjoy la..am still enjoying my job and like it..haha..kalu inda enjoy and teda sinta suda..mimang susa la..haha..

jew said...

tai ko la wel training tiap minggu..kebetulan jemputan CNY belambak ba last month...hahaha..ko tau juga dorang rajin menjemput jadi tukang kasi abis minuman kan..haha..ba wel, ko suda duluan2 tingu IRIS kan?weekend siamau conquer tv di bwh lagi la mau jadi gila tingu drama 14jam non stop..sambil minum air bening saja la..lain la kalau ko blanja beer.hahaha
vera! apa katamu bad times frm mar-oct?i guess mine started awal sikit la feb 10th wajah ku suda permanently ber'scar@belang tarung...harao tiada lagi la pas ni..palis2..hehe

Wel^Beiolman said...

Jew..taie ko la..haha..ko la tu..bgs2 sia mau slim down ko bawa minum beer....nasib lg ko belanja..haha...IRIS...siok jg tp inda best ending..haha..sia inda mau ko menangis tinguk korea lg..susa lg mau p bili beer untuk ko..haha...ok ba belang tarung ko...haha...ko suda mau rancang p plastic surgery kan tu..haha...

jew said...

taie ko la blanja..si aguk kan taukeh kita last week..hahaha
sia tiamau tingu la kalau tia siok ending...sia pigi cari jang na ra juga la ni weekend..ko bagi sia duit wel...ko kaya kan?hahahaha
kalau ada bonjolan hodoh mcm di tangan ko baru sia pigi plastic surgery kan sia bilang tu..LOL

Wel^Beiolman said...

Jew...haha..taie ko la sia kaya..ko la tu..haha....bonjolan?haha...bukan ko suda buat appointment ka tu mau p plastic surgery..haha....siok jg ba IRIS..haha...ending sja la inda berapa selepas susa payah..haha..